39 – Abuse and Survival with Dr. Sandra Speer – Ph.D., CLC, CDRC – Legal Advocate, & Survivor at Lifeanswers

Ep. 39 - Dr. Sandra Speer on Parental Alienation and more.







  1. As a survivor of almost a lifetime of most forms of abuse, I pledged to use all that I learn in life to help others one day.  At that time, I was 17 with little knowledge of who my actual abusers were or how severely they had hurt me.  At that time, I only thought I was suffering from childhood rape. With God as my only guide, I survived the many threats to my life and physical health.  Today, as a survivor, I ask God to continue to watch over me and give me the strength to continue overcoming chronic illnesses and injuries to reach my life’s goal of helping survivors of trauma.

On February 20, 2018, I was thrown out of my protected world to realize that my mother had emotionally and physically abused me since birth.  I had dissociated most of my life.  I will define dissociation and explain why it protects many victims.    On that day in 2018, she chose to beat me with no mercy.  Again, God was guiding my way because I knew not to retaliate.  Often, reactive abuse causes many victims to become blamed for the abuse.  No abuser is worth a jail sentence or further injury of any type.  Today, I share with survivors valuable recovery techniques that help them become strong enough within themselves to not react to their abusers.

  1. Because I was also emotionally abused and neglected by my father, a Child/Family Psychologist(Therapist), I understand how abusive practitioners can be toward victims and survivors.  The practitioners who I am referring to include attorneys, judges, medical doctors, etc.  There is such a thing as Legal/System Abuse Syndrome, which exhibits the same symptoms as PTSD, which develops from being abused by practitioners that a survivor turns to for assistance.
  2. A) Initially, I will talk about the symptoms and why the syndrome occurs
  3. B) The talk regarding the syndrome will lead into the discussion of Parental Alienation (PA).

I will:

  1. define PA
  2. talk about the symptoms of PA in children
  3. why PA is misinterpreted
  4. why so many high conflict divorces that include children are intertwined with PA
  5. what tends to cause wrong PA rulings in the courts
  6. Yes, it is possible to win, and I will discuss some of the ways of winning
  7. The next segment of my discussion will detail how people are treated if they fall under review of a Department of Children & Families (DCF)
  8. Why are so many children wrongly taken from their parents
  9. Yes, the system can be coped with—Parents can be reunited with their children
  10. Last but not least, I will talk about what a person, even if they are a survivor, can do to ensure not partnering with an abuser.
  11. What are the red flags
  12. How do you become strong enough to cope if you do have to walk away from an abuser
  13. Anyone can become brainwashed by an abuser, which is why you should educate yourself

In closing, I want to say that I am living the dreams that carried me through the years.  As a Legal Advocate, not an attorney, I work with my clients throughout their cases until they win.   I assist with whatever it takes to achieve our goals.  Because I am not an attorney, there are no legal limits to whom I can approach for assistance.  I also help my clients emotionally become strong enough to fight their abuser without becoming accused of being a Narcissist or Parent Alienator.

As a Life Coach, I offer “Unstick Yourself” seminars, workshops, and individual coaching.  I have 30+ years working with Domestic Violence (DV) coupled with a Ph.D., being a published author, motivational speaker, and ex broadcaster.  And, possibly the most important part of my past is that I am a survivor of almost all forms of abuse from birth. I understand what my clients are experiencing.

I am honored that you asked me to be a guest speaker on your Saving Fatherhood Podcast.  All of your ideas and questions are welcomed.


Below are my links, and attached is my headshot.


My company website offers information about me, my company, and Legal Advocacy and Life Coaching packages that I offer.


In this private Facebook group, I offer 24/7 live Trauma Recovery Support, including a live support group.  All past live support group sessions are recorded for members to listen to in announcements.


This public Facebook group, “Legal Advocate for You, Not Family Court,” offers general information about legal issues that accompany leaving an abuser and 24/7 Legal Advocacy advice.